The United Parental Front: Building a stable family unit
There are a variety of parenting styles that exist; however, the primary approaches are: dominant parenting, passive parenting and active parenting. If each parent has a different approach or are both using ineffective approaches challenges may arise and destabilize the family unit. The dominant parent tends to create fear in the child as a form of controlling the situation or behavior of the child. The passive parent tends to be a “push-over” indirectly giving up control and allowing the child to have their own way. Another more effective approach is called active parenting where the parents are firm, fair and consistent in the rules, boundaries, guidelines, expectations and consequences in the home. Moreover, these parents allow the child to make choices and learn from mistakes while staying within the limits communicated to the child from the get go. This empowers not only the parents, but also the children because everyone in the family structure knows what is expected and the consequences are clearly communicated in advance. This makes it easier for parents to discipline and educate their children effectively, while also teaching personal accountability to the child. These partners work as a team to create a stable family unit where the child knows the limits in the home. The perimeters initially are quite constricted at the earlier stages of a child’s development (for example, age 2), since they are not fully developed yet to make major decision or even minor decisions in some cases. As the child ages, these perimeters can expand in proportion to the child’s stage of personal development. This allows the child the space to begin to make choices, decisions and to learn from mistakes. As they enter into adolescence they will be not only better prepared to make decisions, but will also have been given the clear perimeters to consciously think through choices and the consequences more effectively. For more information please visit my website at www.TruePotentialCounseling.com
